I-90 will be closed tomorrow across South Dakota. They're hauling a 200 ton lump of coal so they can add Obama to Mount Rushmore. They couldn't find a 200 ton piece of manure.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Great News!
Just wanted to let you know - today I received my 2010 Obama Stimulus Package. It contained two watermelon seeds, cornbread mix, and 10 coupons to KFC. The directions were in Spanish.
Hope you get yours soon.
My Father Is A Stripper In A Gay Bar
One day a fourth-grade teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical answers came up -- fireman, mechanic, businessman, salesman, doctor, lawyer, and so forth.
However, little Justin was being uncharacteristically quiet, so when the teacher prodded him about his father, he finally replied, 'Okay...my father's an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret and takes off all his clothes in front of other men and they put money in his underwear. Sometimes, if the offer is really good, he will go home with some guy and stay with him all night for money.'
The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the other children to work on some exercises and then took little Justin aside to ask him,
'Is that really true about your father?'
'No', the boy said, 'He actually works for the Democratic National Committee and helped get Barack Obama elected President last year, but I was too embarrassed to say that in front of the class.'
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